car oh car..

wen i was away to my homtown,my car is with sedut..
he told me a story about how people wanna borrow my car..
but the thing is,he was so unpleasant about this thing bcoz katanya weneva my car rosak or anything,nobody cares,no one even bother to help me (which i tink is sooo true,hehe)..

actually,evrything that he said kan,makes me feel a bit stupid,hehe..
tp nak wat cne,org mmg slalu nak senang je..
to be an owner to any transport aku rasa mmg sakit mcm ni la kot..
kete buruk aku ni da telan bp ribu plak since beli end of march last year,haih..
so not worth it,tp xkesah la,da kete aku,nak xnak kna jaga jgk..
but i tink kan,mmg xpatut la sape2 yang reti pinjam je tp xnak be responsible..kan nini?
feel lucky dat i stil have sedut this sem..bl kete rosak je aku cari dia..xpasal2 lak dia yang kna teman aku g workshop,deal, n evrything..
nak harapkan aku sorg mana la aku reti..
dunno how its gonna be witout him,sigh~

owh time nak blk miri ari2 sempat lg jmpa bf aku,hehe..
thanz la ye datang jmpa kat eport wpon jmpa 4 only like an hour +,hehe..
susah2 je..
sanggup ko datang,bagos2,sayang ko kat aku,haha..

memory 1st day puasa 2009

alkisah..
jumaat mlm aku stay hotel dgn bestfren aku leya..
pas2 kan sab2 puasa..
kat bawah tu ada kdai mamak..
aku plak xbleh puasa..
so lepas check out hotel hari sabtu,smentara nak tggu cab nak g eport nak balik,aku lepak la kdai mamak ni..
den dtg la org amek oder..
"mau apa miss?"
maka aku dgn slamber nye...
"kasi teh ais satu..syg ko nak ape?"
"aaa...horlick panas satu.."
pas2 aku sambong la sembang dgn budak ni..
tgh2 dok sembang leya cakap asal mamak ni asyik pandang2 kita pas2 sengih2..pelik aku..
den tiba2 balak aku datang n dia tnya slambe nye korg ni minom2...
dgn muka pelik aku pandang dia pas2 br aku igt rupa2nya arini pose la..
terus ktrg chow..
nak2 plak da lambat nak g eport..
kl x sempat gak kot aku lepak abeskan minom 2,kan syg kan?
klaka je..
thanz syg teman aku kat eport..
miss u oredy..
harap sgt ko dpt dtg miri b4 ko blah..
hurm... ko da ada bf skang susah sket la..
adoy =p

ps: i miss my bf too.. luv u b..

misery~

yesterday is when my sakit gigi gone..
im sooo happy..
at last,after 2 and almost a half week suffering..
gler saket,betol2 xtahan..asyik kna telan painkiller+panadol je..
klas pon byk gak termiss..
hurm....speaking of which dat reminds me dat i havent yet pass up my two geochem's lab practicals..
im miserable enuf n yet,come the worse case scenario,where i have to burn my wed miri-kl ticket and bought a new one!
this is because of the very important 1st geophysic presentation (markah dia 20% okkay) has to be done on thursday..
but the thing is,now that the first group da abes present,baru la taw yang lama rupanya nak abeskan each presentation ni..
which make it even worse since im in the last group..
well i might be presenting on friday..
and THAT just CANT happen..
i wont risk to have to buy my new THIRD miri-kl ticket..
da la mahal..ni je pon da waste 250 da..
xbleh xbleh..xde duit lagi da na cover new ticket..
sooo im just hoping dat ade la mane2 group yang baik hati sanggup tuka with us..
plitz let us present first..
i wanna go bak home..sad~

owh,lately i've been wathing korean series...
princess hour-luv it!!
full house-watching it again for the 2nd tym..
my garl-3 more episodes n im finished!! (OMG lee dong-wook is soooo damn handsome)

live her life...

today i found out one big shocking news..
i was like tergamam jugak la wen hear he said about the fact that is supposed to be kept secret.
i noe dat he's intention is to do me a favor..
and aku hargai benda apa yang dia cakapkan 2..
well, he might be wiser enough den me,heh..
all the truth that he told me, i try to accept it all witout complaining..
guess wat,aku bjaya kot diam n dengar dgn open minded yang gile babi nye open,hehe..
malas la aku nak fkr byk2..
ade betul jugak ape yang dia cakap 2..
thanz nway, sbb if not aku xkan penah taw yang sume org xsuka aku..
im so full of suprised dat u wont even noe wen im gonna be somone dat u will hate..
aku rase aku da cukop baik dgn sume org but yea,we cant please all kan?
different people different opinion..i just dont get it why i cant be like myself to get people to love me?why shud i be others?
can i just say 'fuk it' and live my life like i did before with my frens in sunway?
but NO...he said dont..i'll fucked up if i did dat..even if by being half me now, people started to ignore me (which aku sbnrnye xpasan pon if dia x gtaw aku,soo naive..haha).
i dont like the feelings of being isolated..i dont like the feelings of getting hated..but i guess i just have to live it that way..
he said dat maybe i was jeles of her n i was like terikot2 dia..
d thing is, before this i dress up like dat jugak wat..but not here la of coz..dats Y he said,org2 kat sni tgk aku mcm da lain since she came,like i was beginning 2 be her bcoz people likes her,and d thing is,me and her are from different situation,i cant be her bcoz if i do org akan benci aku..haha..kinda funny but 2 tell u d truth, i neva did trying to become her so dat people like me or wat..as for them,lantak korang la nak jaohkan diri dr aku pon..like hell i dont care..!!
aku xpasan pon la korg nak jaohkan dr,npk sgt korg xde dlm life aku pon,haha..
just bile aku dpt taw,aku mcm bengang jugak la sbb wtf dat i've done dat makes ur life fucking miserable?penah ke aku kacau hidop korang?klaka je..
he said dat its not what i've done,its wut they like 2 see me do..derang xsuka aku skang sbb derang rase aku yang tym mula2 masuk sni dgn aku yang skang lain..derang rase aku xseswai dgn derang,dgn life derang, like i dont belong here..wuteva..
one more thing yang he talk about is pasal me and him..he said wen im around him i become another different me, d one more to a bitch with gedik is my main attitude..haha..aku rase aku dgn dia da mmg since ever talk like dat kot..but yea,he said dlu lain coz people around me is not as many as now, and people cant accept me being like dat so dey called me gedik n wat so ever..dia ade ckp jugak,myb even dat guy pon menyampah dgn aku,n diz one i tink is true, eventho we were both good friens and we owez talked like dat since ever, but i tink he might possibly menyampah with me..and wen it comes to him, as hell i do care..
i guess i need to be a loner...
feel like i was left alone in diz big world of mine..
im lost~
argh...fuk it!
my finals are damn near weih..adoy~

Anything between us is now gone…

Everything is to be forgotten…

Sorry 4 being such a burden…

 

Things started to be miserable…

Something that wasn’t even ryte taking over…

4 some reasons I feel like diz is forever…

 

I’ve try everything my heart would

I’ve done everything I could

Just tell me what else I should

 

Are we the puzzle that neva fit?

Is that really it?

Should I call it quit?

p/s: why is this happening in the 1st place?kinda funny,haha..

me DeAr me

Dear me….

Who do u tink ur acting such a bitch?

Like….

Playing hot n cold?

Living white n black?

Running here n der?

 

Dear me…

Why on earth did u do dat?

When….

Clearly its black not white…

Obviously its dark not light…

Honestly its suicide….

 

Dear me….

How can u fix all this mess up?

With…

Me and him and him and him…

Respect is out and guilty is in….

Slowly it’s killing….

 

Dear me….

What will u do?

If…

Over there is love and here is hatred?

There are promises and here nothing is spared?

But wrong decision has been made…

 

Dear me…

When will u do a confession?

For….

Choosing black over white…

Picking up fight over making up…

Liking ‘him’ when u LOVES him….

 

 

Most of ALL oo dear me…

No matter who why how what and when….

Ders no way u can turn bak time…

The fact remains…

Guilty builds…

Confession needed…

Love’s chasing…

Hate’s coming…

 

Be wise…

Neva again says its ok when its not…

Neva again says its right when its wrong…

Neva act like ur cool wen ur actually mad…

Loving me loving him…

Dats all u need oo dear me…

just another confession of the ME me....

......................

dear me...

why is it soo hard 4 u 2 decide?

which one is which one dear?

i still like 'him',like before..

but its d same things over n over n over again..

it wont work out as a plan..

like him,but as what?

dat one question is still a mystery,at least i tink so..

now that another life comes interfering,it become more complicated..

as for my new love one..

i LOVE you MORE then anything else..

but wen it comes to jealousy,i surrender..

its ur problem dat u cant go out hanging with some frens bcoz of ur work..

i understand that  deep inside u,u want a life like mine..

hanging out wenever i wan n with a lot of frens around me..

chilling n sharing..

i appreciate it wen u said that u only have me n ur work in ur life..

but im sorry dat in my life,its not only u..

i have frens,i have my free time,n i live in a campus life..

thats something that u want and i understand dat..

but how dear?

how can i gave u all dat?

by giving up mine?

i dont tink dat dat's d right answer..

sometimes i feel like im being mean..

but the fact is,u cant ask me 2 locked myself in my room so dat  wont have 2 be jealous of what u cant have..

as for that particular 'him', im hoping that no matter what,we can still be bestfren..

kinda miss the long last time that we spent 2getha..

and the way u treated me,heh..

treasure dat all the way..

but yeah,past is past..

just a confession of a 'ME' me..

sigh~